Leif shares testimony about his addition to pornography. Hear the battle from within, and how that affected his everyday life. Part 1 of 3.
Parent Forum Learning Community Event
LINKS
The Fight For Holiness Ep 21 w/Marianne Howard
Website: http://www.beledfamily.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/BeLEDFamily
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/beledfamily/
Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/beled-family/donations
TRANSCRIPT
INTRO
You're listening to the BeLED Family Podcast.
LEIF
If I believe what the Lord has done, and if that mattered to me at all, wouldn't I have stopped?
DANIEL
Welcome to the BeLED Family Podcast, where we learn to become Light Entrusted Disciples. God calls us to BeLight: know who you are in Jesus. BeEntrusted: what does God call us to do, and BeDisciples: who does God call us to live in community with? I hope that you've enjoyed the previous podcast episodes as we've been going through a series on marriage. For the next few podcasts we're going to be talking about pornography. I know that's a crazy, big word that a lot of people are not good at talking about including a lot of churches, ministry leaders, and parents, too. It’s a topic that we just don't address very often in the church, and it can be scarcely talked about in the home. There are plenty of staggering statistics out there that are very hard to believe. Some, depending on what you have heard and what you read, children have been exposed to porn by the age of 12, with 15% saying they were exposed before age 10. Crazy numbers. Pornography is not an exclusive problem for boys, as traditionally has been viewed, but it has become a much larger problem amongst girls. And some studies say that is going to be a larger problem for girls than boys in the near future. A few episodes ago, Marianne Howard from D6 was on our podcast, and she talked about these statistics and more. She said that the way we combat this is by fighting for holiness. In this next three part series, my friend Leif will be sharing with us about his battle against pornography, his season of counseling, and his triumph over darkness. On this first episode, we're going to hear more about Leif's journey and the battle he had with porn. Leif, welcome back to the BeLED Family Podcast. Glad you are here. How are you doing tonight, Leif?
LEIF
I'm doing pretty well. Thank you, Daniel, for having me back on the podcast. Flipping sides of the table though this time.
DANIEL
Flipping sides.
LEIF
I’m not hosting. I'm in the hot seat.
DANIEL
We're not flipping flapjacks, we’re flipping, we’re flipping sides. Now Leif, we know that porn is, we've said it, that porn is a tough subject to talk about, and one that likes to stay low in the weeds waiting for its next victim, you know, usually it doesn't wait very long. You just kind of find it. It's almost like it doesn't come to find us. We just stumble upon it all the time. It's where we would go to the grocery store, it's there. It is not just going on our phones or computers. Without getting too deep into the weeds, would you tell us about your battle with pornography in the early stages?
LEIF
Yeah, definitely. It was, I don't remember the exact age. You can ask pretty much anyone that knows me. My memory is not the best when it comes to placing dates and times on everything, but definitely young. I'd say somewhere in that 10 to…10 to 12 range. Kind of like you're talking about. And it started off…not innocent. Nothing about this is innocent. But, you know, it started out as just kind of a curiosity, something some friends were talking about. Kind of figuring it… You know, seeing a magazine for the first time or just kind of this, this, I don't know, I guess a curiosity is just “what is this?”, trying to figure it out. “What's going on?”, you know, and learning a little bit about that. I guess in the earliest stages and just kind of getting deeper from there.
DANIEL
So Leif, before we get deeper into the weeds and thank you for sharing your initial states. Let's make something clear. You know, we don't want to… You just shared something with me before we recorded that's important before we move on. Would you share that with our audience?
LEIF
Yeah, absolutely. I was just saying that as I thought about “How do I share this? How do I talk about this? What does that even look like?” You know, a big thing that I want to address and convey is the seriousness of it, and how deep of a struggle and an issue it was. But without in any way crossing the line of, in any way seeming to bring glory or even acceptance of what this is, and definitely talking about it in a way that is honorable before the Lord. You know, the Bible addresses a lot of heavy topics. We talk about murder and rape and adultery and incest and tons of stuff throughout the Bible. Heavy topics. But in no way are they ways that are bringing glory or light or even, you know, graphic detail. It paints a clear picture of what happens in these instances without, I guess, lingering on any of those details that don't need to be addressed to cover what is going on.
DANIEL
Right, right, right. So with that in mind, Leif and I think our audience deeply appreciates what you just said there. Can you then tell us a little more about how it started to get ahold of you? How did this addiction start to take, it obviously took root in your life, how did it start to grow?
LEIF
Yeah, definitely. So, like I was saying, I think it started out early on as just kind of this unknown, right? This thing that wasn't really addressed, but obviously was something out there. A lot lighter, I guess in a sense, you have varying degrees, I guess, in terms of pornography, and yeah, just kind of started off, “what's going on? what am I seeing? what is happening? what?” Trying to understand, you know, the differences between men and women. And why is this a thing that I'm seeing and how does this work? And then some, I don't know, this idea of secrecy and just hiding, I guess. Thinking of Genesis, you know, we see Adam and Eve and after they eat that fruit there's just this instinct to hide from God, right? They immediately know without God saying, “you did wrong,” “you did this,” they just know, oh, I gotta hide, right? And so God comes and asks them, “where are you?” Because they knew, this isn't good. And I think there's just that built-in reaction to us that we recognize, we might not know what it is, we might not be able to put words to it, but this, this hiding, this natural, protective hiding secrecy that comes along with it. You know, I think that's a great tool of Satan's to just isolate and separate people from being vulnerable. And so that sets in too at an early age when it comes to this journey.
DANIEL
Do you think when it was starting to set in, was it hard to even acknowledge that this weed, this sin was taking hold in your life?
LEIF
Yeah, yeah, I would say so. I mean, you just… I think you kind of, at least for me, isolate like boxes, right, isolated. There would be an instance, and it was fewer and fairly far between that I think this happened at a young age. It just, kind of, you know, you come across something and you're kind of curious and you dig into it a little bit and then, you know, you stop and then you just kind of move on. I think you just put it out of your mind. Kind of close that box up and go back to life until eventually, you know, however long later, you kind of open it back up and you're like, “oh yeah, what is this? Let me, let me dig a little bit more into this. I'm kind of curious or intrigued by this.”
DANIEL
Let's talk about denial, self denial. Now we tend to ignore sin. It's similar to what you just had said there, Leif, because we don't want to deal with it, or we don't want people to know. And the tendency is to hide it, and deny, and be in denial that we're even addicted, or have a pornography problem or whatever addiction it might be. The easy choice is to deny. Why is denial so easy?
LEIF
Yeah, that's a great question. Yeah, I think denial is a huge part of my story. And from the people that I've shared with the accountability, friends that I've built and shared stories with, I think it's a part of a lot of people's stories and journeys, you know. You just see it. Whether it comes to addiction for pornography or anything, you know? How many people are willing to say, “yeah, I'm kind of gluttonous. I like to eat a little bit more than I probably should” or “yeah, I kind of have a greed problem. I go to the store and I just want everything that I see.” And, you know, you don't think of it like that. You kind of downplay. “No, no, no, I just, I just…”
DANIEL
It's not that big…
LEIF
“It's okay. Everybody eats until they feel really full. It's Thanksgiving Day. It's fine. It doesn't matter.” No that's, you know the root of it is more “I want this.” And so I think there's a lot of denial that can come across in people's lives. And for me, a big part of it came across with pornography. You know, I think it just… You hear people's stories and you hear other people that are addicted, and you're like, “wow, that's so crazy, that's so hard.” But you’re like, “I mean, that's not me. Like, I'm not. I could stop, right?” You're like, “I'm going to stop. I'm going to stop. I'm going to stop.” And the next thing you know, you messed up, you're back there again. And you're like, “Oh my word, I can't believe I messed up,” but that's it. You know, that's, “I don't actually need help. It's not that big of a deal.” And I think to help with, for me there was so much guilt and shame wrapped around this. Like I knew what I was doing wasn't good. And I think that shame helps feed the denial because you're so ashamed if you tell yourself, “I'm not actually addicted. It's not that big of a problem.” You don't feel as bad about it.
DANIEL
Right.
LEIF
All in quotes. You know, because obviously all you're doing is deceiving yourself and really just adding fuel to the fire of your guilt and shame as you move forward. Because it's just, it’s like this shame cycle, you know, you feel bad, and then oftentimes to make ourselves feel better, we reach out to something unhealthy. Right? So maybe you reach back out to pornography or maybe it's alcohol or drugs or whatever, and you do that trying to feel better. And there is a moment of dopamine and excitement that comes with that. And then it crashes back on you and you realize, “oh my word, I did it again.” And then, you know, it just feeds the shame. And then you have to deny what really happened and change the narrative in your mind so that you don't feel as much shame.
DANIEL
Right, as you felt shame, as you, you know… Some people will say, “well, it just happened. It just, you know. I don't know, I thought I was doing…I don't have a problem. It just happened, you know, but I got, I've got control the next time…” You addressed that well, Leif, when a person's kind of stuck in that pattern. For you, let's talk about you. This is your testimony.
LEIF
Yeah.
DANIEL
When you were stuck in that “it just happened,” that pattern of not being able to break it, what was happening in your heart? What was happening in your mind during that time?
LEIF
Yeah, the whole idea of “it just happened,” I think is just another form that we see coming off of that idea of self-denial. As I look back over my story, you know, I can recognize now just how much I deceived myself. And you just, because you're deceiving yourself, you're telling yourself it's not that big of a deal. It's not as bad as maybe it seems. Whatever. A big part is you just don't focus on it. You don't pay attention to it. And if you're not… Not that you want to focus on it to a fault or to a way that you are again bringing glory to it, but if you can't recognize the attacks of the devil, then you're not prepared to defend yourself. You know, Ephesians talks about putting on the armor of God and preparing yourself, dressing for war and preparing for battle. And if you don't realize you're about to walk into a battlefield, you're just going to get smoked as soon as you step out there. And so…
DANIEL
But you, Leif, I mean, you were…you kind of said that you were repeatedly okay, you're almost saying you're good getting smoked every single time. Did you in your mind kind of justify, “Ah, it's probably worth it. It's fine.”
LEIF
Yeah. Oh yeah. Totally. I think there's…as much as I knew it was wrong and I knew it was bad, there was still, there was still this excitement that came with it, this thrill of, I don't know, rebellion unknown. Like, I don't know if…I don't know, like our sinful hearts just are selfish and sinful. And so
DANIEL
I mean, for you, it was, it was calling out the sin, right? It was just going, okay, enough. This is ridiculous. Before we get into that turn, though, without going too deep in the weeds and taking into account what you said earlier, we don't want to glorify the pornography. But, you know, at the core here there's a principle of addictions and things like that that we want to address. Can you tell us, without going too far into the weeds, how bad did it get for you?
LEIF
Yeah, absolutely I guess, yeah. And getting back to my story a little bit, just to help set the foundation and kind of where I'm coming from. So obviously the early stages was young. It started out this once in a while thing, kind of curious, checking it out here and there. And then that curiosity, that desire, took root in my life and I didn't get rid of it. And so it builds up and it becomes just this full on sin that at this point, you know, you're just, you pursue it. And so as I entered into my teen years, it's something that I would start, you know, actively seeking out. Again, I don't remember the frequency exactly, but, I mean, it was probably a weekly thing, maybe every couple weeks, just as I had opportunity because I knew it was bad and I knew that my parents, you know, had gotten caught or called out on it. And so, like kind of, “oh, I got to stop.” But then, you know, you let it go for a little while. And especially in our culture that I think is so sexualized, there's all sorts of things that just kind of point you back to it or hints towards, you know, this whole idea of sex. And so it just worms its way back in there. And it just got to be worse and worse, you know. It went from just seeing a magazine here, trying to look at something there, to searching online and, unfortunately, the internet is filled with a lot of garbage that you can find on there. And so, it got to the point where there were times it would get better for a stretch and then it would get worse. But I mean, it got to the point where, you know, I would spend, I don't know how much time, a day, but a lot of time, probably a day, you know, with multiple viewings of coming back to it repeatedly throughout the day as I had time to just try to sneak back to that and just pick up where I was, find something new, keep going, and just pouring time and thought.
DANIEL
Did you think about it in between those times, too? Was it like almost, even though you said weekly, maybe a few times a week, maybe every other few weeks, but was it something that was almost constantly on your mind?
LEIF
Yeah, I think so. I think, you know, it's… I think what would happen is, again, thinking of the acting-out-cycle was something we’d talk about a lot in counseling, something that, you know, again, as you prepare yourself an understanding of how your brain and your body, and just kind of addiction works is such a helpful tool to be able to recognize what's happening and combat that where you're at. And I think we'll get more into that a little bit later. But whether it was in the moment, obviously I'm focused on it, thinking about it afterwards, maybe there's some shame or whatever, but you're still thinking about it. You're recalling what happened, what did you do? And then because you're thinking about it, you start questioning or you have these ideas of, “oh, what if that?” or “what about this?” And you almost start to allow this questioning, fantasizing, start coming to your mind that you then start pouring into that and you're like, “I wonder what it would be like if…” whatever. And so even though it starts as like a shame sort of thing, you're just giving thought to it, which then transforms these thoughts back into this form of desire and longing almost to go back for more.
DANIEL
Right. And I know.
LEIF
It’s twisted and weird, but yeah.
DANIEL
It's twisted and weird, but that's the whole addiction. That's this weed of sin that really messes with us. And I know that our desire in the next episode is to talk more in depth about the counseling and things like that, but this is a problem for you that lasted for quite a while, didn't it? Not just in your high school years. Would you take a brief moment to kind of talk about what that…how long it lasted for you?
LEIF
Yeah, absolutely. So, it started out when I was young. I said like 10 or 12 grew through high school. And it was really in high school and kind of the tail end of high school that I really just kind of started to have this desire to rid myself of this. Really, you know, more of a heart of like, “I know this isn't good.”
DANIEL
Yeah.
LEIF
Versus just a head knowledge. But never quite true enough of a desire to have taken the true steps necessary for it. And so it was through high school that I kind of started seeking accountability. But nothing that was ever like true accountability. And so it would start as this type of accountability that would start during that portion of shame in the cycle and then would seek, “hey, I need help.” But then as it started to creep back in and I wasn't able to combat it, that shame and feeling of failure would just set in, that I would just pull away from the accountability. And so I went through that cycle for a while and took that in through college and into my relationship as I was dating and getting engaged, and that added a whole nother level to it because I knew, I want to be married. I've wanted to be married. I just always expected to be married. And I never really wrestled with, like, “I'm not going to…do I want to be married or not?” Like I just knew, like, hey, marriage is what comes. As I'm moving towards that and thinking of that, but always feeling like there's still this thing and how do I…how do I stop that? And just fighting for a hold on it to stop, you know, and you keep thinking, “okay, I can stop. I can stop. That was the last time, I'm done.” You know, but I was having that thought for years, of, “hey, this is the last, I'm going to stop. I'm not going to do it anymore. This is the last time. Hey, September, it’s the month of September in 2017. That's it. I've, you know, I'm not doing it again.” But then you slip up and you mess up and you're like, “oh, great. Well, there goes the month of September. I guess I'll start over in October. I'll start next week.” You know, like, “oh, this days already shot whatever. Might as well just give in to it and then I'll start over tomorrow, you know.”
LEIF
And so it was just this cycle and it got…I didn't… I wish I could say that as I was moving towards marriage, it was something that yeah, it, it eased up. It was something that got fewer and farther between and I mostly had control of it, but it's not. It just got worse and deeper. And there were times that I would have a good little stretch. But so, you know, with addiction it’s never enough. You always, like, you seek more. And I remember somebody saying that pornography, unlike drugs or alcohol where you can overdose or you get so drunk you pass out like something like that, pornography in a sense there's…you just don't stop. You can literally just intake and intake and intake. And there's nothing that, like necessarily forces you to stop. You know, there's not necessarily a breaking point of your body by too much of an intake. And so, yeah, it got bad. Like I said, during some of the worst times, it was lots, many times during a day, you know, wake up and during the day you have a break and you come back to it at night or throughout the afternoon, like just any spare moment that you had. That's what you turn to, it’s what I would turn to.
DANIEL
And you brought this then into your marriage then didn't you? I mean this weed you brought into the marriage?
LEIF
Yeah, yep. And so tried to, you know, tell myself, like I knew, I knew in my head marriage isn’t a solution for this. And so I'm trying to get some sense of freedom before that. And then I got married and there was a honeymoon period where it was great, and it stopped for a while, and it was probably the best progress, If you can call it that, it wasn't progress. It was just a…
DANIEL
Pause.
LEIF
Yeah, a pause. But marriage doesn't change a heart issue. And when your heart is sinful and selfish and not pursuing the Lord, a marriage isn't going to fix that. And so, yes, sadly, I brought it into my marriage, and it's something that…I mean, it's probably so obvious, but if I could change that, I would. I…my wife is amazing, and she has been so amazing through this very difficult journey.
DANIEL
Yeah.
LEIF
And the Lord has done amazing things in my life through this and through our marriage and has just strengthened our marriage as we've had to battle through this. As I've battled through this, and we've just had to work through what that does to your marriage, but I would rather have a strong marriage without having had to battle through this
DANIEL
Right. Now, okay, so, you know…It’s such a…it is a topic that the church, people, Christians, parents, like I said earlier, we're not used to talking about. So even talking with you about this, kind of feels like we're trudging through areas of the field where no one has gone through. Seems like, “what is it?” It's hard to navigate. And it just, even in your testimony, Leif, it sounds like for you, you were trying to navigate a sin and addiction, in this case pornography, on your own. You weren't finding any success. You bring it into the marriage. Your wife is amazing, but yet I know that it had a negative effect. I know that you reached out to me a couple times. I know that you got a lot of help trying to combat this, and I know that your wife was supportive of you. And it just seemed like, from what you've shared previously with me, that it just wasn't working. Things were not helping you. So for you, what was the final breaking point? When was it that you needed something beyond what you had, and what motivated you to find that?
LEIF
That was…again, I brought this into my marriage. It was something I had talked about with my wife before we were married and just shared with her, “Hey, this is a struggle I've had.” Because throughout all of this, there's so much… I'm going to take a whole tangent, side thought here.
DANIEL
Please do.
LEIF
As I get into this. There's so much shame that comes with this. It's such a weight and a burden. And as you're in it, it weighs you down so much that you just feel so terrible, bad. I don't even know the words. This is where I wish my wife, who's much better with words, could help me. She gave me this whole, like, emotion wheel so that you can, like, look at, like, “oh, it starts with anger. And then what are all the words to describe angry?” Anyways, I need something like that now to help me describe. But, you know, I was involved in the church throughout all of this. And so there were times that people would, you know, come up and say, “wow, you're doing such a great job,” or “thanks for…” “oh, it's just so great what the Lord's doing in your life.” “Thanks for sharing that thing.” And you're like, “oh, that feels really nice.” Like, “thank you.” And then on the inside you're just like, “you don't know.”
DANIEL
It's a lie.
LEIF
You don’t know. Like that, kind of makes me feel good, but you don't actually know who I am or what I'm like. And so as I go into my marriage, you know I’m… The Bible calls the man to be the spiritual head of the household and to be this spiritual leader.
LEIF
And I just feel so incapable and such…
DANIEL
Wow.
LEIF
Like a, like a liar. I feel so two-faced to my wife. Yeah, I knew it was wrong. And having listened to some different sermons and people talk about it, just knew, like, I can't just go into my marriage and not have shared this with Dorie because with this shame, with this, you know, at least for me, because of this, I questioned, “am I a Christian?”
DANIEL
Wow.
LEIF
Do I even care about what God has done for me? Because if I did, why am I doing this? If I believed what the Lord has done, and if that mattered to me at all, wouldn't I have stopped? And so you wrestle with that, and as I've come through it, you know, I mean, not necessarily all the time, but it crosses your mind. But as I've gotten freedom from it and gotten to share my story and my testimony more, I'm able to look back and see all the different ways that the Spirit was at work in my life. You know, I don't remember exactly when I prayed to accept Jesus in my heart, but I know I was young. And just this belief of…no, the Lord was with me, and his kindness and graciousness spared me. For as bad as things were, he spared me so much more of what it could have been. And so as I look back now, I see all the ways that he was with me. And as I think about sharing this story and I think about sharing this journey, there's still that idea of shame and fear. And as I've told a few people, “hey, I'm going to be doing this podcast.”
LEIF
You know, I've gotten some of the results of like, “really? Are you sure? Are you sure you're going to do that?” I’m like, “Ah, I mean it is, it is a little nerve wracking, right? Like people I know are going to hear this and they're going to know this about me.” And so in that sense, when I think of it from a worldly view, yeah, it's super scary to talk about this because people are going to see me and realize you're not as good as I thought you were. And so that's hard. But when I think about it from the view that matters, from the idea of God and his story, and I think about… A few weeks back, we were going through Esther in church and the way Pastor Jonathan was sharing about it, it was in story form. And he started it off every week as, “here is the story of God as told through the life of Esther.” And just thinking of my testimony in that way. And so as I think about my story, I think about it and I realize I'm not the main character. If my life is a movie, I'm not the main character. The movie isn't about my life, the movie is about Jesus, and I'm the side character that just gets to pop in for a second. All I do is help show something about the main character, and I help bring that story more greatness.
LEIF
And so, it is not about me. And if people's eyes are on me, including mine, we're all looking in the wrong spot. And so I realize when I share this journey, it's not, “Hey, let me tell you the story of my life.” It's, “let me tell you the story of Jesus through the life of Leif.” And when I think about it like that, I realized, “oh, yeah.” It might make me realize, “oh, I really messed up. I did a lot of bad stuff.” But instead of focusing on that, I realized, “oh, look at how amazing Jesus is, that he took somebody that did what I did, and look what he did with it.” Instead of this negative view of “look at how bad I am.” It's this glorifying of God and saying, “Look what he was able to take…”
DANIEL
Yeah.
LEIF
“…and what he was able to do with it.” And as I think about my story like that, my life, the life and work of Jesus, it's exciting to share, because my weakness just makes him all the greater. And I'm just going to keep going because I think of this song by Kings Kaleidoscope called “Felix Culpa.” I don't even know how to say it, something like that, but the whole chorus is, you know, “a fortunate fall, my sins are stories of grace to recall.” And I just think of that. I'm like, yeah, when I've messed up, you know, when I'm, when I'm broken, that brokenness is just the time that I get to tell about how good God was.
DANIEL
Wow, yeah.
LEIF
You know, and so, as I come to this, and I have to just remind myself that God is good, this is a story about him, not me. And so it's a good story. If it’s a story about me, it's a bad story.
DANIEL
I think that, Leif, just speaking as your former youth pastor, as a mentor, and now as a friend, a man who respects you and your family. And I was talking to your dad about this, you know, that you were going to do this, and he's like, your dad said this to me, “I'm so proud of my son. That he's willing to talk about it, and he's so open.” And I think what you just said, Leif is beautiful. It's not Leif's life. It is the testimony of what Jesus has done for Leif, and I think that really brings it full circle from what you said earlier. Let's not glorify the addiction or the pornography. It's definitely a problem, and it's definitely something that wants to throw off the story, what Jesus wants to do in our life.
DANIEL
And that's something that a lot of our listeners, if they're listening or tuning in, maybe feel caught in that addiction. They're caught, they're in there. And I know that as we wrap up this episode, we're going to in the next episode, we're going to talk…you're going to talk more about the counseling aspect of it and what kind of broke that.
DANIEL
But before we go, one last question for you, Leif. You know those, you've done a great job already speaking to these people, but in the next moment here before we close, talk to those people who are caught. Talk to those people who cannot break the cycle, whether it's pornography or some other, alcohol, whatever addiction it might be.
DANIEL
Would you speak to them one more time before we close this episode?
LEIF
Yeah. Daniel, I think if there is one quick thought that I would share with any listener that's in this, and it took me a long time to even realize that this was something I felt, but there is hope. I realize as I look back on my journey and as I've seen the work of the Lord in my life, how hopeless I truly felt.
LEIF
Because by the time I finally was able to see the change in my life that the Lord was making, I realized I never truly thought this was possible. I never really believed I could get here to where the Lord has brought me. And so, for anyone that's listening that is struggling with this, just know, God is greater than what you're doing.
LEIF
His mercy is more. And there's hope that he can do a good work in your life too.
DANIEL
So this wraps up our first part with Leif talking about his testimony on pornography. And I want to thank you, Leif, for this first part. And I know that in the next episode, we're going to talk more about the counseling aspect. And I did take note, you didn't answer my question, although you did ask if you go on a tangent.
DANIEL
So we'll start, we’ll lead off with that question on the next BeLED Family episode, Pornography Part 2. So, we'll see you then, Leif.
LEIF
See you then. Thank you, Daniel.
DANIEL
Thank you for listening to this week's BeLED Family Podcast episode. We appreciate you taking the time to tune in. Help us by sharing this podcast with your friends. Support the BeLED Podcast and BeLED Family by visiting us at our website: beledfamily.com and follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Until the next episode, BeLED in all that you do.
Leave a Reply